Marriage Rites In Igbo Land, Around Nigeria

• It is believed that anyone who wants to marry from the eastern part of Nigeria is going to pay heavily before getting a Wife.

There are various reasons Marriage rites in igbo land are on the high side i will take you through the Marriage rites.

Speaking to Mr Deji he was of the opinion that majority of the men are scared to commit due to the rigorous marriage rites.

We will be starting with traditional marriage Igbankwu.

It is common to get invited to a traditional marriage (Igbankwu) and certainly worth witnessing one.

This is because bride price is an official recognition that a woman is married in Igbo culture for everyone to attest.

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The bride price also varies from family to family, some collect bride price as small as N5,000 while some collect as much as N100,000.

Marriage in Igboland is not just an affair between the future husband and wife but also involves the parents, the extended family and villages.

First the groom asks his potential partner to marry him. Assuming that this is affirmative, the groom will visit the bride’s residence accompanied by his father.

The groom’s father will introduce himself and his son and explain the purpose of his visit.

The bride’s father welcomes the guests, invites his daughter to come and asks her if she knows the groom.

Her confirmation shows that she agrees with the proposal. Then the bride’s price settlement (Ika-Akalika) starts with the groom accompanied by his father and elders visiting the bride’s compound on another evening.

Traditional Igbo Wedding

They bring wine and kola nuts with them, which are presented to the bride’s father.

After they have been served with a meal, the bride’s price is being negotiated between the fathers.

In most cases there is only a symbolic price to be paid for the bride but in addition other prerequisites (kola nuts, goats, chicken, wine, etc.) are listed as well.

Usually it takes more than one evening before the final bride’s price is settled, offering guests from both sides a glamorous feast.

Mazie Nwanko says if any man don’t go through all rites and traditions of the traditional marriage he is not considered a Man

Bride with Iko looking for husband

After settling the father, mother, Umunna (men) and Umuada (women), the next and crucial stage is the payment of dowry which is regarded as bride price.

This is not done outside, but inside the room.

The man and two members of his family will go inside to meet his father in-law and discuss the bride price (dowry).

Another evening is spent for the payment of the bride’s price at the bride’s compound when the groom’s family hands over the money and other agreed prerequisites.

The money and goods are counted, while relatives and friends are served drinks and food in the bride’s compound.

After all is settled, the traditional wedding day is planned.

The wedding day is again at the bride’s compound, where the guests welcome the couple and invite them in front of the families.

Traditional Wedding Color Combinations

Gold head tie, gold blouse, and gold and red skirt. White blouse and magenta skirt/wrapper.

Wedding dresses might have two color designs. The bride might wear a monochrome colored outfit (dress).

First the bride goes around selling boilt eggs to the guests, showing to both families that she has the capability to open a shop and make money.

Then, the bride’s father fills a wooden cup (Iko) with palm wine and passes it on to the girl while the groom finds a place between the guests.

It is the custom for her to look for her husband while being distracted by the invitees.

Only after she has found the groom, she offered the cup to him and he sipped the wine, the couple is married traditionally.

During this ceremony, there is also the nuptial dance where the couple dances, while guests wish the newly weds prosperity by throwing money around them or putting bills on their forehead.

Nowadays, church wedding follows traditional marriage.

During this ceremony, the bride’s train, made up of the bride followed by her single female friends, enters the church dancing on the music, while the guests bless the bride’s train by throwing money over the bride and her entourage.

The groom receives the bride at the altar for the final church blessing by the priest.

Sometimes, the traditional marriage is combined with the reception that is then preceded by the church ceremony.

The culture of bride price is as old as the Nigerian people. What is bride price?

Bride price is simply materials or cash offered to a prospective bride’s family by the prospective groom for marriage considerations.

This often includes money, goods or even property provided by the groom or members of his family to the bride’s family.

Speaking to mazie Chidebere he explained that every custom had different ways in approach of the list and this discourages some men from marring from some parts in Igbo land.

Often times, a list is provided by the Bride’s family and which the groom can negotiate depending on his financial capability.

Bride price is an ancient practice that many argue should be abolished since it makes it look like the woman is being bought.

Others argue that it is a beautiful practice and which is a core identity of the Nigerian people.

How expensive is bride price in Nigeria?

The cost of bride price in Nigeria range from the dowry requested for by bride’s family and community, to the traditional items requested to be presented before the wedding ceremonies can take place.

Getting married in some parts of Nigeria can tempt a young men into robbing a bank, especially if he doesn’t have a good job or a viable source of income.

Hence many men tend to get married late because they want to make all the money they can before they attempt fulfilling any marriage rites.

Here are some of the most Expensive Bride Price in Nigeria:

The Mbaise People of Imo State

The Mbaise people are found in Imo state part of Nigeria and they occupy three local government areas in Imo State (Aboh Mbaise, Ahiazu Mbaise and Ezinihitte Mbaise).

The major cities of Mbaise people are Ezi na ihite, Ahiara. Agbaaja, Oke Uvuru.

The Mbaise people are known for their quest for higher education, hence the large numbers of graduates and professionals amongst them.

The Mbaise culture is amongst the most expensive cultures to marry from in Nigeria because of the numerous components that make up their traditional marriage list.

As a matter of fact, the more educated the bride is, the more expensive the marriage list becomes. For you to marry in Mbaise and be applauded, you have to spend N350, 000 up wards.

Some families are considerate and will not ask for everything. They may tell the groom to settle the kindred, because if he has to do everything, he might need up to N500, 000.

The Annang People of Akwa Ibom State

The Annang people are found in Akwa Ibom state and they are the second largest ethnic group in Akwa Ibom state.

Any groom who intends taking a bride from the Annang people must be ready to meet fulfill the traditional marriage rites of the people and it is indeed expensive because of the loads of stuff and fees that the groom is expected to buy and pay for.

Personally, I have read the marriage list and it is almost 4 pages long. The cost could be about 500,000 to 700,000 Naira.

Ikwerre People of Rivers State

The Ikwerre people of Rivers State also have very expensive marriage rites, and this is largely because they believe their daughters have been raised with pains and dedication and any man that would have them must pay suitably for them.

The dowry and items listed for marriage ceremonies may cost up to N1 million before a family concert to a man marrying their daughter.

Ibibio People of Akwa-Ibom State

The people of the Ibibio ethnic tribe of Akwa-Ibom State are predominantly agriculturalists, and their daughters are raised to be strong and self-sustaining.

Marrying from this tribe can be very expensive because their daughters are believed to have been groomed to support a man and help him raise a family.

A man should be ready to spend upwards of N700,000 before a marriage date is fixed among the Ibibios.

The bride price is sometimes, non-negotiable.

I in fact happened to witness a traditional wedding of one of my uncle getting married to an Ibibio lady, just because he didn’t buy all what was stated in the list, the wedding was cancelled.

It was an embarrassing experience.

Ngwo People of Enugu State

A man who wants to marry from the Ngwo people of Enugu State must demonstrate that he is able to fully take care of his wife by meeting the exorbitant ceremonies required for the wedding to take place.

The man is given a long list of items to buy or provide for the family of the bride and for the wedding before he is allowed to marry their daughter.

Bororos of Northern Nigeria
Bride

The Bororos of northern Nigeria look identical to the Fulanis in several aspects and they have several similar cultures.

It is believed both the Bororos and the Fulanis require several live cows that could even constitute a herd before releasing their daughters for marriage.

They may request for between 10 to 50 live cows, depending on the ability and wealth of the suitor, before a wedding ceremony can take place. With the dollar rate as 2016, I leave you to do the maths.

Ijebus of Ogun State

A man is not tasked so much at attempting to marry an Ijebu lady from Ogun State, but the wedding ceremony can be as expansive as feeding and entertaining a whole community.

The dowry or bride-price requested of the suitor and the wedding items listed to be provided may be within reasonable range, but the Ijebus are known to be jolly-hearted and wouldn’t miss any social opportunity for a lavish party or cultural event where food and entertainment take center-stage.

Nkpa People of Abia State

The Nkpa people of Abia State occupy Bende local government area of the state, and they value marriage so much that an outsider from the tribe or community will pay through his nose to obtain a wife from amongst them.

It is believed that marriage between an Nkpa man to an Nkpa lady is cheap and affordable, but highly expensive and prohibitive if the man is from another tribe or state.

The Ogoja People of Cross Rivers State

In Cross River State, there is a local government called Ogoja Local Government. The top communities in Ogoja are Ekpogrinya, Nwang, Esham, Nnang, Egbong, Ewinimba and Banasara.

Getting married to an Ogoja lady is expensive due to what is being demanded from the intending groom but, it is customary for the bride’s father to return the bride price to the new son-in-law during the traditional marriage ceremony because they believe that their daughters cannot be bought.

The Efik People of Cross Rivers State

When it comes to rich culture, the Efik people are endowed. Their marriage rites is always an event to look out for.

The marriage list generated depends on the families involved, and especially, if the groom’s family is influential.

The bride price is decided in Euro, this is due to the high colonial influence on them.

Some cultures demand that a groom pay between N500,000 to N3 million as dowry on a bride before the wedding takes place, and some demand that up to 50 cows be provided as dowry for the bride before she is released as a wife to her suitor.

So many have condemned the expensiveness of marrying in Nigeria, but its a practice that has been there for ages.

Birth celebration, as the wedding ceremony, varies from village to village.

PHOTO CREDIT: HB PIXELS

IHESIULO GRACE AMARACHI